I often get asked the same question: If I had the ability to change the past, what is the one thing I would do different in the way I dealt with my daughter's eating disorder. Quite frankly, there are many things I would do different. However, if I had to pick just one . . .
I would not be afraid. I would not give the disease any power over my own emotions. My fear of her illness gave her eating disorder a comfortable place to live. Because I did not want to cause any upheaval in the house, I walked lightly and did not say much. As a consequence, the eating disorder behavior and the eating disorder voice grew stronger. As it gained strength, I became more fearful.
Treatment has come a long way in the last ten years -- thank goodness! Parents are more involved in the process of recovery and it is important that we not be afraid of this disease. We must take a firm stand against it's accusations, it's blame, it's threats. Are we scared? You bet we are! That is why it is so important to get help for ourselves through this journey. I cannot say that enough. It was a pivotal point for my husband and myself. We learned better ways to cope and we also learned to recognize the eating disorder voice and not to fear it. We learned to be strong and we learned to stand united.
